Mostly everyone grows up with a person they look up to, a higher power, maybe a family member or an idol. Someone can be inspired by someone to live their life a certain way, follow a way of life, or just believe or look at things with a different perspective. But, sometimes all these beliefs can be ruined or destroyed by a threat of some sort. Maybe someone has a different perspective than others, and it changes the way of life for others. This is the case for Pablo, a Christian teenage boy in his senior year of high school who is struggling to accept his sexuality in the book The God Box by Alex Sanchez. He is very religious and believes that he is sinning when he thinks about the same gender in a certain way, he believes that he is hurting 'God', or the thing in higher power. One day, a new kid named Manuel arrives at the school, totally open about being gay, which concerns Pablo. Manuel changes Pablo's whole life his perspective on his religion.
We follow Pablo throughout the story, starting off with the introduction of a new character named Manuel who just moved to Pablo's school. Pablo already has had some feelings for guys since he was younger and he didn't want some new kid announcing that he was gay out of the blue. Since Pablo's girlfriend, Angie, felt bad for Manuel since he didn't really have any friends, invited him over at lunch and it seems that like Manuel already suspects that Pablo is secretly gay. In the text, "During Bible Club, should I have joined Angie and Dakota in speaking up for gay people? Or should I have joined Elizabeth and Cliff in speaking out against them? Was I resisting evil by at least trying to keep my distance from Manuel? Or was I turning my back on him?" Manuel is discriminated against and Pablo is conflicted if he should help Manuel or not. He doesn't know if he should side with his homophobic friends or the friends who are trying to help out the new kid.
Following all these conflicts, Manuel invites himself to Pablo's house and they start hanging out. Pablo starts developing feelings for Manuel, but he starts questioning how Manuel can be Christian if he's gay. Manuel opens up a whole new world to Pablo and it leaves him thinking if he can really love someone for once. "When I got home that night, I prayed again: 'Please, God. Please make me feel the only thing missing in my love for Angie.' But when I climbed into bed and closed my eyes, it was Manuel's face I saw leaning over me, and his wavy hair." It seems like he can't get Manuel to stop enveloping his mind, yet he thinks it's still wrong to like a guy. He wants to love his girlfriend Angie, but he just can't seem to.
After all of Pablo's thoughts, he realizes that he really does like Manuel, and he can't do anything about it. However, he still couldn't accept it when it was too late. Jude and Terry, the huge and terrifying homophobic jocks in the school attack Manuel right after Pablo left him in the lot of the mall. Manuel gets a shattered knee, broken ribs, brain damage, vision loss and goes into a coma. Jude and Terry get charged for attempted murder. Finally, when Manuel gets out of his coma, Pablo kisses him, and he knew he found the one for him. Pablo finally accepted that he was gay, and he says so in the text, "Our eyes met and locked, taking me back to that first morning in homeroom. Suddenly I understood the pull I had felt that day - and ever since. It was love, beyond all reason." He was truly in love with Manuel and he wasn't going to let anything hurt Manuel ever again. Later on he prayed and thanked for Manuel and Angie for understanding, and it really shows how Pablo changed in that one year.
In conclusion, Pablo really did not deal well with higher power, or 'God', but everything turned out pretty well in the end. Pablo had to deal with himself, trying to not be gay, when he couldn't change that, and Manuel with the people in school. Pablo believed that 'God' would hate him for being gay, yet Manuel convinced him that love was love. "Sometimes I grow impatient and ask, "What's your will for me now, Lord?" If the answer doesn't come, I remind myself of Psalm 46: Be still and know that I am God. And I try to wait patiently, taking hold of Manuel's hand."
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